Introvert

I came across a topic which spark my interest.

Introvert.

People often misunderstood me for this reason. Introvert.

I enjoy eating alone. Well, I eat with with family and close friends, at times. 

I prefer to stay all day long at home during weekend. I don't know whether this is a sign that I am getting old or it is because of my introvert personality that I don't like to wander around the city during my leisure time. I love it when I stay at home doing nothing, just lazying around or doing something I have passion in it such as baking. Well, the other reason is because I don't like going to place with so many people and being in a crowd.

I could get in with people. But, it is hard for me to go and mix around. You can put me in crowd full of familiar or non-familiar faces, but it takes time for me to mingle around. I would at most smiling at them, and then sitting in the corner watching everyone or just doing my own thing.

I don't have close friends except for few. It's true that I don't have many friends, I cannot deny it. Thanks to all whose willingly stick to me through ups and downs, through thick and thin. I don't have to mention who are they, they know who they are.

I am more to listening to others than talking to others. I don't know how to entertain people. I once told my mom, if there are people came to our house to visit during Eid Fitri celebration or at anytime while my parents are not home, I will not open the door for them and just pretending like they are nobody at home. 

I don't know how to open up to others. This one. I really have one big issue regarding this. I have a hard time to move on from someone I love. And because of this, I cannot open up to other. Even if my aunties or my friends want to introduce me to someone, I just don't have a heart to do so.

This is not something you can cure with medicine. Not even with a force. 

This is highly related to trust issue. Being betrayed once and you lost all your trust to other, or you are having a trust problem from the beginning. 

I don't want to be an introvert, but I am already an introvert.

And as an introvert, I don't need your pity or sympathy. Just try to understand me would be more than enough help for me.